I was sitting on my bed the other day before going to sleep and writing down my thoughts as I do every night. I have this tendency of asking myself what I need, and I think that is one way that I measure how grateful I am. Why? Well, because, sometimes, when we realize we don’t need anything is the moment we are at peace and happy with ourselves and our lives. When I sit down and think those crazy thoughts of mine, I realize that many may question if we even deserve to be happy, do we get to be happy if other people are already happy, or if I am happy, am I stealing happiness from others?
All in all, we all go through that type of mindset, and we may sometimes overthink that it is easier being miserable and seeing everything as the glass half empty rather than the glass half full. This is because, as people, we are programmed into being driven to negativity and into those dreadful and long-lasting ideations that can seem endless. However, I do have to say that it is not bipolar nor overdramatic, as many people consider it. It is okay to have downer moments and to have gloomy days, but it is not okay to stay that way, as I have said before.
One may feel that it is draining to look for the positive outcomes in things, but this is because we have grown up in this society where whatever is negative is ordinary and expected. As for seeing things in a positive and optimistic aspect, it is considered different and rare. But why? Back to my main point, we are so used to seeing how people are that by getting out of our bubble and facing our traumas and all those problems and issues we have, we put them aside for them to haunt us in the future. That is how we jeopardize our happiness. We don’t want to be happy. We are scared to face what we genuinely like and love; this can be because others have limited us, or we have limited ourselves to discovering and experiencing if we are genuinely captivated with that thing that we have built a wall around.
My dad once told me that I have to face my fears because fears are what put limits, and limits are what stops us from moving forward. And unless somebody else does it first, we don’t realize what we have lost or won. However, if we do it first and take that initiative, we help others by guiding and teaching them amongst our successes and failures.
So, because we limit ourselves, we limit our happiness, limiting who we truly are. That limit robs us of living our life, and we aren’t conscious of it until we are hit in the face by a wrecking ball and fall. We need to start facing our limits and questioning who we are, to know if we live or are happy for somebody else or ourselves.
Z.
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