Have you heard of shadow work?
Shadow work is healing that darker side of yourself that you don’t necessarily want anybody to see. Some say that they are the flaws we have, the negative thoughts we get or the triggers we have. Doing shadow work is difficult because we find ourselves in a position where we question who we are, and if that darker side of us is normal. Discovering or accepting this side of ourselves clarifies who we are. In a way, we remove the weight off our shoulders of constantly trying to hide it instead of working with it to find a way to reverse the shadow side and improve it.
While walking, I realized that shadow work is like flipping a coin and hoping that it lands on the side you chose. A coin has two sides, the one we chose and the one we didn’t. We hope to get the side we want, but if we don’t, we choose to extend the game and flip more times so we can eventually win. Regardless of it being a game of probability, it is also a chance to understand the benefits of both outcomes and how we can try and see the good in it. But something we also don’t see all the time is that a coin has both sides which makes it a whole. There is a beauty behind it, whether you choose one side or the other, there is something good that will come out of it. I think shadow work is similar because we have to accept that there are two sides to us, how we have to sometimes choose the side that will benefit us the most, and understand that whether we see one side or the other, both sides make it a whole.
Shadow work, or at least what I have understood from it, is how we have a dark side to us and once we hear about it, we want to try and understand it. However, once we get to this part of healing ourselves, we also have to understand that some things that are not so pretty will come up - and these things may come in unexpected ways. For instance, I have been getting certain dreams, or visualizations during my meditations that are signs of parts of myself that I have not worked on. The triggers we get are only part of the shadow work, the other part is reducing the egotistical thoughts we have that are related to doubt, fear, insecurity, and shame. Once we realize that these thoughts are present, we can begin by getting to the root of the problem, which is the shadow side or also through our subconsciousness. Understanding that we have to see the triggers as thoughts and patterns that began somewhere, is like playing a game of Clue where you have all the evidence and now you just have to solve the case. However, the tricky part is knowing what can and cannot be discarded so that you can move forward. The thing about seeing this process as a game is similar to knowing that with practice or with experience, you get better at doing it. Just like anything, there are ups and downs, and we have to know that there are moments when it is easier to deal with things and times when we don’t know how to because we are distracted and blurred by the things around us.
But I invite you, to try and play this game for the fun or curiosity of it, to discover more about yourself. Figure out the patterns, the shortcuts, the tricks to get through obstacles and ways to win or overcome challenges.
Z.
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