We tend to fight or run away from our negative emotions instead of accepting them. Doing this will usually make us fall from our emotional bicycle. What do I mean by this? Well, the emotional bicycle is the balance of our positive and negative emotions without falling and being able to keep ourselves somewhat in a straight line. It may be hard when facing our negative emotions, but the best way to deal with them is by facing and accepting them so they don’t bottle up and, well, eventually explode.
There are some ways that you can deal with these emotions so you don’t feel so emotionally drained when you least expect it or when someone triggers you. I will give you three suggestions on how you can balance your emotions. It is like learning how to ride a bicycle; it takes time. First, when you noticed any type of negative emotion (sad, angry, guilty, etc.), you write all the other things of which could provoke that emotion, even though only one thing could have triggered it. Second, you have a questioning ladder or pyramid, however; you wish to call it. This ladder begins by questioning why you feel a certain way and leads to releasing other negative emotions related to the first one. I will give an example of the co-relation of the emotions, but first I’ll give a list of twelve well known negative emotions: anger, sadness, fear, sorrow, frustration, disappointment, worry, embarrassment, jealousy, hurt, fright, and shame. If you feel angry, go back to the first suggestion and question why you feel angry and then ask yourself what it is you are sad about. Anger is the release of the emotion of something that happened, while sadness is about something that didn’t. Then, if you still feel that you are stuck and not releasing anything, question what you are afraid of happening if an action would have happened. And as the list goes on, you will feel relieved and eased by the weight that you were putting on when adding all the negative emotions. And, third, going back in time to understand that even if you have had a negative emotion in the past, you have gotten through it. By doing such, it will become easier to face those emotions and go deeper into releasing things that you didn’t know you had.
Regrettably, few dare to go back in time to face those emotions because we fear the problems or the wounds it might open up again. And the fuk’d up truth is that we don’t always want to balance our bicycle because it is easier to fall and get back up and try again, then to go on and with the help of the past get a better future.
Z.
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