I feel like most of the time, we aren’t doing enough when we are doing much more than we can imagine. We push ourselves to the point where we feel burnt out, and then we claim that we feel completely fine until we feel tired and drained most of the time. And I think that we have gotten so used to always showing the best side of ourselves that we forget to show how we truly feel; and forget about showing it to others but showing it to ourselves. We forget to be honest with ourselves, or maybe it isn’t even honesty that we need, but trueness. Don’t you ever think you feel fine, but you don’t? Or perhaps we tell ourselves that things might get better, but at the moment, we feel like shit? This article isn’t meant to sound like a bummer, but I feel like we don’t talk about this side of being vulnerable enough for us to feel comfortable with it - even when we are alone.
I feel as though we sometimes hide the fact that things are not as great, or feel fabulous, because we want to show the world that we are grateful. And maybe sometimes, we show that we are thankful for what we have by avoiding our problems and smiling at the world and the people around us, acting as though we are a beautiful crystal ball that has not been dropped yet. Okay, that came out a bit harsh. But what can I say but the fuk’d up truth, or what comes to mind when I want to share what I genuinely feel but then feel as though I can’t? And it isn’t because I am afraid to show vulnerability, but it is mostly because I am scared that I would be perceived as ungrateful. On the other side, I also feel that how we relate gratitude and express it has to be something more personal. It isn’t something that has to be done in a very show-like way.
I think the most important thing we must do is be grateful, regardless of how we show it. The other thing is that gratitude comes from within; there is no need to jeopardize your emotions to please those around you. Because if we are not okay, that is what we will share with the world. So, the first person we always have to check up on is ourselves, and the second thing we have to do is say thank you to ourselves. We have gone through a lot; whether people know it or not, we must first appreciate how far we have come and our strength. And it is okay to break down and cry because we can’t always have a smile on our faces, which is fine. We will have ups and downs and want to sleep one day, but we must allow ourselves to express how we truly feel and be honest about it. Be grateful for your strength and for allowing yourself to show it.
Z.
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